Finally Free

Halloween 2015: Hybrid Animals

Hear that? That's the sound of Japanese Men
around the world fapping to this picture.

What's a better way to start off the Halloween Count Down then with physical abominations created with Photoshop?

If you've spent enough time on the internet, you've probably seen Photoshop images of different animals put together to make some otherworldly creations, such as this, this, or this.  I mean really, everyone has seen the Shark Cat.

This is something I've been meaning to write about for quite a while actually. I've just never really gotten around to doing it. I found a lot of strange pictures of Hybrid Animals these past few days and I can't wait to share them with you all!

Crocobear

I really only like this one because it reminds me of some kind of Kaiju, and I love Kaiju. I could totally see the Crocobear getting his ass kicked by Godzilla or Ultraman. Why haven't Crocodiles and Bears been crossed before anyway? They seem so perfect together.

Blama

That's right, a Llama (I think) crossed over with a bunny: A Blama. Two creatures that also seem like they should always be mixed together, it just seems so obvious once you see it. I don't know why but I feel like this thing probably walks around like a person and not like a Llama.

Rhinophant

This thing has one of the weirdest, longest head's I've ever seen. I really think that's what makes it a lot better. If it didn't have a weird head, it's just be a trunk-less and horned Elephant.

I can think of this guy walking around peacefully, and that it's probably not violent at all, unless of course, it has to be.

Dragon

I don't know if this one's technically a hybrid. It's made the same way though, so I'm gonna count it. I really like Geckos as Dragons, I think that all Dragons should be Geckos, or Goats, Goats are good too. They just seem perfect for the job. The fact that they lick their eyes makes them good as Dragons in my opinion.

Ghoul

I'm calling this a Ghoul because of H. P. Lovecraft, and if that confuses you just look it up, because I don't want to spoil anything for anyone.  This is like the only one that's scary , and by that I mean that this thing is fucking nightmarish. It almost looks real, the skin and fur of the chimp and dog are just so similar and matching that it almost doesn't look Photoshoped.

Banana Fish
 

Yes, that is both a Banana and Fish. I can't look at this thing without being amazed and terrified at the same time. Like on one hand, this picture is beautiful and knowing it exists makes my life that much better. While on the other hand, I can't stop imagining opening one of the Bananas we just bought and seeing this little fucking thing. It would be a terrible and traumatic experience. I would be a bananaphobe for the rest of my life.

Dear

This thing is adorable. Somehow crossing one of the ugliest dogs with one of the worst and most hideous creatures on the planet made of the cutest thing's I've ever seen. Dogs and Bears need to be bio engineered to create these things in real life.I want one of these things, more than any other creature on this planet.  I would rather have this thing than a man-sized Starfish. I would rather have this thing than a mouse sized Elephant.

Chamelophin

This is the only Dolphin I've ever seen that is cool, other than those pink river Dolphins and Leilons. This guy actually kind of reminds me of Leilons and that's one of the reasons he's in the list. The Chamelophin would be a pretty cool creature to see in real life. They probably live in Coral Reefs.

Shog

The Shog is defiantly one of my favorites. Another one that I could see being a Giant Monster, in fact I designed a giant monster quite similar a long time ago. This is also probably one of the scariest thing on the list.

Halligator

The Halligator is one of the weirdest looking on the list. It almost reminds me of something canine-like, I don't know why, because nothing about it has any canine features. I wish this is what canines looked like in stead of adorable little puff balls. But on the other hand, if this is what canines looked like, we wouldn't have the Shog would we?

Rhinodile

This one just screams dinosaur, without looking like any known dinosaur, except maybe something out of the early Triassic Period. The Rhinodile here really isn't all that interesting though, other than the fact that a mix between a reptile and mammal can create a dinosaur.

Hippecko

The Hippecko is really one of my favorites. I would like to see this crawling around my backyard or even in my house! I'm sorry to say that I don't have a lot to say about this one either though.

Mini Werewolf

Obviously that one image of that tiny monkey that everyone on the internet knows but with a wolf face. But I don't want to think of this thing is a Monkey/Wolf  Hybrid, I want a tiny werewolf. I mean sure, this could be a small monkey that turns into a werewolf, but I think of it as a normal person that transforms into a super, tiny werewolf.

Weagle

A really interesting design and mix. It seems like a pretty obvious mix, as Wolves and Owls have become such a big pop culture thing and are often drawn together. But it sort creates a haunting affect. If this thing swooped down at you in the night, it would be horrible, it would be terrifying. Almost like the Jersey Devil. You know what, this thing is The Jersey Devil, I've just decided.

Pat

Holy...fuckings...shit!!! This is horrible, it's terrifying, This is easily the scariest on the list. I take back what I said about The Shog, this is ten times scarier than the Shog. Pat is pure fucking nightmare fuel. 

Seagle

Another creature born from pure nightmares, but somehow adorable. It looks like a big beaked slug. And slugs are adorable, and if you disagree you must be Satan. This one seems to be sleeping, and I can't picture it any other way. But maybe these things always sleep, and they never wake up. Like ancient creatures from the dawn of time that are waiting for the right time to wake up.

Dabbit

This... this is pure magic. Magick even. This is more likely Magick than Magic (if you don't understand that, then you don't know a lot about Aleister Crowley). Dabbits are something I wish existed in real life. I'd love to have one. And it would get alone great with the Dear! They'd just play all day and sleep in the same bed at night and be best friends.

Walrus Snail

Yup, that's both a Walrus and a Snail. A WALRUS!!!! AND A FUCKING SNAIL!!!!!!!!! Don't those two things just belong together!? It works so well. The only thing that could make this better is if it's eye stocks where also tusks. Wouldn't that be amazing? I mean sure, it wouldn't be able to see, but that would make it so much cuter!

Armildophant

This thing is adorable. It's not very well made, but it's adorable. I have a hard time imagining this thing rolling into a ball because of the size of it's head, and that's hilarious.  Don't you just wish these where real? Like they'd just be walking across the road done in Texas and Arizona and probably have like little prairie dog town style houses in the desert.

Rooster Cat

This thing is beautiful. It looks so real. If I was still like 7 years old, I might believe this thing is real. Who ever made this image is a master of Photoshop. This is a totally believable creature.

Shamster

This thing brings to mind the movie Critters, and that just makes him that much better.  Obviously just a sharks mouth put on a hamster's (gerbil's?) body. But it makes such a great image, I can imagine an entire swarm of these things just ripping into people and devouring them. Just gnashing their little mouths and eating people. AREN'T THEY JUST ADORABLE?!?!

Spowl

These things just keep getting more and more adorable and cute. Owls and Spiders should always be spliced together, they belong together. Two super creepy animals together make one of the most adorable things I've ever seen. I also refuse to say these things are ALL spider sized. They're all different. Some are as small as jumping spiders, and some are as big as large dogs, and they all live in the same cave. And in that cave they spin massive webs and trap people to drink (spiders do that you know.). These things aren't nearly as cute anymore.

Hedge Eagle

Ooooooooh!!!! This thing is too much. It's adorable. It beyond that. This thing is my spirit animal. If I had my own island, I would fill it with Hedge Eagles, and close off sections of wilderness to protect the Hedge Eagles. They're probably hunted by Weagles all the time, and are even hunted for sport by those damn Jersey Devils. DAMN YOU!!!! DAMN YOU, YOU DEVILS OF NEW JERSEY!!!!

Pandakeet

The Pandakeet is another one that I just want to hug! Also one that I'd put on my island. Isn't he adorable? I think this one reminds me of a kaiju of some kind too. I can totally see this dude hanging out with Ultraman (not fighting) or maybe even living on Skull Island.

Cephaloshroom

I really, really like this one. Gives me a Lovecraftian feel. Looks like something out a fantasy story, like maybe even D&D. As creative of a creature this one is though, it's not that great of Photoshop.

Slird

MAJESTIC!!!!! MAJESTIC AS FUCK!!!!!! This is a beautiful creature and it upsets me that none actually exist. These things would be magic in the flesh, just imagine them  flying around outside your house and building nests on top of street lights! Imagine them living in my basement!

Rhinomelon

Take a look at this majestic beast. A delicious, majestic beast. There are quite a few of these Rhino pictures on the web, chicken ones, alligator ones (as we have already seen), and even a Shark one. But this one is by far the best.

Just imagine an entire watermelon environment. Every living creature made completely of watermelon. And not only the animals, but the plant life, and even the fungi!

Weapon X

I really couldn't think of any other name for this thing. This thing though, it's just beautiful. Mixing feline and reptile features work in such a great way, but are never really done quite enough.

This guy also reminds me the extremely homoerotic He-Man's battle cat. Only a lot cooler and more vicious looking.

Hippocrab

One of the best Photoshoped images ever created. This creature really just invokes a true emotional response in me. It brings a tear to my eye. This is a creature of pure beauty. An amazing creature, that could only dwell in the majestic plains of the after-life................ or in my basement.

Bull Penguin

This is a seriously terrifying image. Just imagine this thing waddling toward you, gnashing it massive jaws. Not even a polar bear would dare to fuck with this thing. Not to mention, this thing is a penguin, so they are in flocks, meaning that these things could just fuck a polar bear up.

I was originally going to save this one for last. But I found this last one kind of last minute, so I'm using it as the final creature. It rivals the Bull Penguin and the Hippocrab as the ultimate living thing on what ever planet these beautiful things come from.

DUNNN....

DUN...

DUN DUNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Pine-Owl

BEHOLD!!!!! THE MOST BEAUTIFUL!!!! THE MOST MAJESTIC!!!! THE VERY MOST AMAZING CREATURE TO EVER WALK THIS MORTAL SOIL!!!!! THE PINE-OWL!!!!

Isn't this just the most incredible thing to ever walk the Earth? Isn't this what Photoshop was meant for? The fact that this image exists is what makes life worth living. I need this image printed from my computer 500 dozen times, so I can hang it around the city on street lights and and adorn my bedroom walls with it.

This is the king of all hybrid animals, this is the kings of all animals period.  The grand supreme, the grand magnus, OUR LORD AND SAVIOR!!!

Cosmic Entities Part 1

THE FOLLOWING IS A WORK OF FICTION
COPYRIGHT JAMES B. DAVIS

The Slime

The Slime is an ancient creature that exists in the outer reaches of space. The Slime appears as a massive wall of membranous slime in empty space. The Slime is completely sapient, and can talk through the means of telepathy. It's age is uncountable, and seems to be an elemental of Slime.

Dali-Gan, The Living Star

Dali-Gan is an ancient creature that originated in the Dali System during the Grey/Dali War. Created when a Grey's spirit merged with a sun, Dali-Gan then engulfed the entire system and every living thing in it. Absorbing every living thing's life force and power, Gali-Dan became an immortal Cosmic Entity.

Dir'Shigyoo

Dir'Shigyoo is one of thee oldest creatures living in the universe and in all realities. An all powerful creature, Dir'Shigyoo is made of Dark Magick and Light Magick, two things that never mix. How Dir'Shigyoo is even alive is unexplained, as when Dark and Light Magick combine they react in explosions, black holes, invert energy, and even at times rips in realities. Dir'Shigyoo landed on Mars when the planet still flourished and was not overcome by war. Dir'Shigyoo was worshiped by the Martians before they went extinct and he went into hibernation.

Offethoth

One of thee oldest creature in existence, Offethoth is as old as the Universe itself. Born during The Big Bang, Offethoth is a universal elemental and one of the first five elementals created. Were Offethoth lives now is unknown, but it is thought that he was sucked through a black hole and thrown across the universe.

THE NEW WORLD IS COMING

THE NEW WORLD IS COMING....

Random Stuff!

Well, I have not idea what I'm gonna write about, I'm just gonna make this article up as I go along with out any sort of plan, let's hope it works out!

SCP-511

One of my favorite SCPs, SCP-511 is a large biomass of cats that live in basements or crawlspaces. But the thing is, these are not normal cats. They often have extra limbs, eyes, organs (sometimes on the outside of the body!), or to little of these things.

Hagfish

Hagfish are some of the coolest animals in the ocean. How many other animals do you know that turn the water around them into a thick slime? Hagfish use this slime as protection against larger animals. When are large animal bite or tries to bite one, it will quickly turn the water around it into slime! And sometimes even suffocate the larger animal with the slime!

Tortoise - Gamera

This is a great song! By the band Tortoise, it's a great instrumental jam to listen to while drawing or something like that. I suggest you listen to it.

Dog-O-Pillar

From the film House 2 (one of my personal favorites) that I have written an article about in the past. This guy comes from prehistoric times and is one of the best characters from all horror cinema! He is brought to life by what I think is a hand puppet, and sadly got no stop motion scenes, which is a shame, because this movie has some nice stop motion.

Ooze Monsters

Some of the greatest monsters to ever come from Adventure Time, these creatures are even from when Ice King was Simon still. They are a lot like zombies in many ways, they even infect people and turn them into Ooze Monsters via bite.

Graboids

Graboids are the infamous worm-things from the Tremors Series. No one knows what they are really though, I'd like to think they are prehistoric though. They still have two more too!

Also play this game that features them, you can play as Kevin Bacon!: link

Cookie Cutter Shark

Cookie Cutter Sharks are the only animal I can really say that I like. Sharks scare the shit out of me. But Cookie Cutter Sharks, I love them! They're still really scary, because they can bite out small little chunks out of you. But I like them because they are Bio-Luminescent, and just so interesting.

Alternate Reality: 01001101 01110101 01110011 01101001 01100011

01001101 01110101 01110011 01101001 01100011 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01110010 01100101 01100001 01101100 00100001 00100000 01010111 01101001 01110100 01101000 00100000 01101101 01110101 01110011 01101001 01100011 00101100 00100000 01100101 01110110 01100101 01110010 01111001 01110100 01101000 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01100110 01110010 01100101 01100101 01100100 01101111 01101101 00100001 00100000 

01000001 01101100 01110100 00101101 01001010 

01000001 01101100 01110100 00101101 01001010 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01100001 00100000 01100010 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100001 00100000 01000001 00100000 01100111 01101111 01101111 01100100 00100000 01100010 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100001 

01000101 01100001 01110010 01110100 01101000 01101100 01100101 01110011 01110011 00100000 

01000101 01100001 01110010 01110100 01101000 01101100 01100101 01110011 01110011 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01100001 00100000 01100010 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100001 00100000 01010100 01101000 01100101 01111001 00100000 01110000 01101100 01100001 01111001 00100000 01101101 01110101 01110011 01101001 01100011 00100001 

MONSTERS-ARE-REAL- THE NEW WORLD IS COMOING

MONSTERS ARE REAL! THEY EXIST! THEY ALL HAVE NAMES! THEY ALL ARE REAL!

THESE ARE REAL MONSTERS!!!

KX123.5  - Window Monster 11110111101101

K-234.1 -  Family Monster 1000001011111011

X51.0 - Forest Monster 1111111101111111

XD52 - Claw Monster 001011010111011

KZ051 - Laughing Monster 1010101011101

K5252.5 - No Eyes Monster 111111111111

K72.5 - Computer Monster #1 11100010101

X52.7.8 - Dinosaur Monster 000100100111

XX2.5 - Spider Monsters 100101000100111

KKX627 - Robot Monster #1 111010001001

K25 - Unknown Monster 10001010011001

KKX78.5 - Big Monster 1010101011111101

X21 - Fowl Monster 11101111101110111011

KKX1.25 - Expressionless Monster 1000000000001000001

K75 - Computer Monster #2 10100101011111110110101

KK2.5 - Doll Monster #1 111111111111111011111

KK2222.5 - Alien Monster 0101010110101010111

XXK123.4 - Bug Monsters 1000010111101101

KXK34.4 -  Teddy Monster 0101110100010101

KZ345 - Toad Monster 1000101000101101

KKZ1.6 - Brutal Monster 111101111011101

K25.1 - Child Killing Monster 11111010001011

WX234 - Watching Monster 10000100100100101

KKX145 - Bed Monster 1010101010101010

X7 - Voice Monster 11111110111111111101

X51 - Doll Monster #2  10101010111110111

ZZK222222 - Very Real Monster

THERE ARE STILL MORE MONSTERS! BE SAFE UNIVERSE!!!